10 Things People From Hawaiʻi. . .

I keep reading all these articles, “Ten (or 11 or 20) Weird Things Only People from Hawaii Do.” And then I scratch my head and think, “Heh???? When did we ever do THAT?!?!?!?” So, I decided that Kaʻʻ ahele Hawaiʻ i needed lists of things that are either unique to Hawaiʻ i, or more commonly done in Hawaiʻ i than in North America.

SO, here are the first ten:

Ten Things People Who Grew Up in Hawaiʻi Probably Do

  1. Stay aware of the weather forecasts: We live more-or-less in the middle of the world’s largest body of water. A LOT of storms swirl across its face. Sometimes they are hurricanes. So we stay aware of the weather and keep supplies on hand so we can ride out the storms. Besides, how else ya gonna keep up on the surf report?
  2. Think 65 degrees Fahrenheit is cold: When the mean temperature is around 80, yeah 65 feels cold. And there are very few homes here that have heating or fireplaces.
  3. Have eclectic tastes in sweets: With one of the most ethnically diverse populations on the planet, we are lucky to have access to a huge diversity of treats from many lands. Andagi, malasada, baklava, mochi, moon cake, suspiros, churros. . . .
  4. Still use traditional words for directions: When you basically live on a small round thing that only takes two hours (at most) to cross by car, directions suited for vast continents don’t really make sense. So we use directions that do make sense. Inland (mountainward) – ma uka. Seaward – Ma kai. When circumnavigating the island, directionals are in reference to where you are going and where you are coming from.
  5. Like salty, meaty dishes: We catch it a lot for our love of things like Spam musubi, Portuguese sausage, and loco moco. Despite Honolulu, we are still pretty much a rural community. Hey, North America – before dumping on us about our fave foods. . .  Chicken fried steak, pork sliders, skillet sausage and rice. . . hellllloooooooooo!
  6. Call North America the Mainland: Yeah. It’s a Territorialist holdover from WWII. At least we don’t call it “The States” like you folks from the Mainland do.
  7. Forget that the Mainland changes what time it is twice a year: Yeah. So half the time the Mainland telemarketers call us at 4 a.m., and the other half they call us at 3 a.m.
  8. Try to explain that just because Google Maps says it’s there doesn’t mean you can get here from here: Unless you have a humvee or a horse.
  9. Calculate distance by time and milage: Because I need to know WHEN I’ll get there, and how much gas I’ll need to do so.
  10. Don’t have “sun guilt,” whatever that is: Apparently there is a thing called “sun guilt,” in which you feel bad for staying in and watching Netflix instead of soaking up as much UV as possible. I do not know a single local person who suffers from that. Personally, I just do what I need to do, and give thanks for the beauty of the day I was given.

Every place is unique and has its own delights and challenges. Enjoy wherever you are, because that’s where you be!

Please send ideas for future columns to me at kumu@kaahelehawaii.com!

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—Kumu Leilehua

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